Twelve Billion Is Cheap

It cost the taxpayers $800 billion back in 08.

It was the Bankers back then.

They cutsie-pooed their tranches of tranches of tranches of "shit" (quoting The Big Short) into a fucking catastrophe.

The current cosmic vibration left behind of that this time is a mere $12,000,000,000, a mere 12% of this year's War Budget (Petey Hegseth renamed the Defense Department recently, so I guess its budget got renamed also) bailout.

To the farmers.

And the farmers didn't do anything.

To deserve to need that bailout.

Except to farm.

And grow stuff.

Like soybeans.

I think I have heard that this is a best crop in years.

So the farmers aren't cutsie pooing anything.

This time the fucking catastrophe was more like a fucking fuck up.

donnie likes tariffs.

Especially when they are irrationally, unexpectedly, capriciously and arbitrarily applied.

"I AM THE PRESIDENT", HE IS FREQUENTLY HEARD TO SAY TO HIS MIRROR AS HE APPLIES HIS DAILY ORANGE. 

That poor mirror.

She is kinda stupid, kinda blonde and totally, hostilely vapid.

But she is the president's mirror.

So what she says counts in donnieLand.

She hums, she sings, she does rotating flings - all for donnie.

"Yes Mr. President; yes Mr. President; yes Mr. President; you are the fairest of them all".

So, he attacked China with 145% tariffs.

Or some number.

Doesn't matter with donnie.

It changes every morning.

Before he has taken his wolf pills for the day.

And he's still applying orange.

Anyway, China said "fuck you very much we will buy our soybeans from now on from Brazil, and Argentina".

So America's farmers have a bumper crop of soybeans with no place to sell them.

On the surface, that looks to be an undesirable position.

"In amelioration of your situation I will send you twelve billion dollars in the next post" donnie said to the farmers today.

He's trying to sound old fashioned by saying "the next post"; I think Karoline Leavette - his mirror - told him to say "in amelioration". 

That kind of shit gets a lot of farmers to like him. 

He is pretty sure.

Somebody told him that farmers like big guys with big vocabularies.

"We have all this tariff money, you know".

"And you can feed the beans to the pigs".

"Gettysburg Address level", saith the mirror.